Saturday, November 6, 2010
The return of the Queen
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Blog Block
Our hunt for a house is still going on but we hit a few snags. I lost a large sum of money while traveling and so our move has been less than impressive , thank goodness for my mother always having a back up plan and paying for our temporary housing.. Our kids are doing well and adjusting the best they can and we hope to have all our issue resolved in a few weeks. Its been an adventure to say the least and it looks like we will survive.
The second is my lost phone, I lost my IPhone on the final leg of the trip and I am seriously going though withdrawal. I will not be able to replace it for a few weeks at least and I have decided that its a good time to see how dependent I am on this little gadget. I have promised to go at least 30 days without my beloved phone and so far I have realized that I used it a lot and I miss it a lot. Its like missing an arm for me and I am not doing well but its been less than a week and I think its a good experiment to see if its really needed or just wanted.
Memphis is where we wanted to be so we will of course make the best of it. I hope to have better news the next time I check in and I hope to be able to check in more often.
A new adventure awaits my family and we are all looking forward to the wonderful things that are ahead.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Leaving the Sticks
I was never really able to truly commit to looking for a job let alone taking one because too many kids and not enough babysitting opportunities in our area. In California's defense we did settle in a very small town, with limited resources and I think that is what really did us in. Living in the sticks was the first of many bad decisions that we made while living here. It’s been a long two years filled with doubt and regret and learning that you cannot really go home and even if you do it’s not what you remember.
As we get closer to leaving this place I will miss it believe it or not, in this small town I found a few kindred spirits who made it a little less boring. I loved the fact that there was only one school system and I could walk my kids to and from school every day. I will miss the feel of a small town, but not the drama that can go hand and hand.
We look forward to our future and hope that things work out better for us in Memphis then they did here, we have no illusions and know that times are hard everywhere, but we have hope that we can and will survive. I promised myself that this would be our last big move for a long time and our goal is to give our family the stability and security that so many strive for.
Monday, September 6, 2010
Crazy run in the family
My head is swimming with all the things that need to be done and all the things that need to be packed. I am under such a large amount of stress that it is not even funny. During all this time we had to share the news with our kids, our little kids were thrilled, our teens not so much. My oldest child had decided to stay in California and although I hate to leave him here I do respect his decision. Our oldest daughter of course took the news pretty hard, but after a few days of pouting she is now understanding the reasons we are going and has accepted our choice. Its not going to be easy to move a family of 7 across the country in less than 30 days especially since 4 of them are under the age of 6.
I look forward to the change of scenery and hope that our lives get a lot better then they were here. I have to say our move to Cali never really worked out well for our family and in hind sight I think it should have been a vacation and not a move. I look forward to seeing my family and getting our lives started again. So for now it time that I attack another room and try pack a few boxes before I start my homework.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Shout out

Thanks again Jessica you really made not just my day but my month and they are really appreciated and in heavy use.
Jayde
And So it begins
Right now my goal is to be able to make a healthy snack and I have been looking everywhere for ideas. I have a few recipes that I have been working on and so far so good. I am looking for any suggestions of easy, quick, healthy, homemade snacks. If you have any please leave me a comment and I will get back to you on if it passed the kid test. This last week I made Pretzel Monkey Bread from Amazing Moms, it was a big hit with my girls. We took it a step further and omitted some of the salt and in turn the girls dipped their bread in cinnamon sugar. I love the fact that they have several recipes for monkey bread and I look forward to trying a few more. This week I am hoping to work on a bento box inspired snack, fruit platter, a few baked goods and even some cookies just for fun.
Looking forward to a wonderful school year and looking forward to some amazing after school snacks.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
How Old Is He?
Side note, his father want to celebrate his birthday every year on his due date not the date he was born. We are currently still in the middle of that argument (discussion) and hopefully by next year we will be at some sort of compromise or I will have won.
Friday, August 6, 2010
What is Normal?
Jayde
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Back to the Grind
At home with me this year will be L3(2) and L4(newborn), which means nothing will be accomplished unless both are sleep. I plan to continue to participate in the playgroup this year as soon as it starts up, which means 2 days a week my schedule will be even more insane. I look forward to returning to the group and allowing myself some time to unwind and interact with adults for about an hour.
Don't get me wrong I love the fact that they are going to school, but I can see the PTA meetings, the parents nights, the parties, the pictures, the yearbooks, the gym clothes and I panic. I look forward to my daughters first day of preschool and kindergarten and hope that they have a wonderful year. As the summer winds down, I look forward to art projects and homework know that these are rights of passages that all kids should enjoy. So as we mark another day off the calendar I say to all the moms with crazy schedules about to impact their lives. "Buckle your seat belts its going to be a bumpy ride"
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Back and Forth
Problem is that I am not sure I want the job right now. I just had Logan a few months ago and him being premature its still like he is a new born. We currently only have one car and although my DH and I would work in the same town its doubtful it would be the same shift. Public transportation her is horrible and I would have to leave super early and still get a ride home no matter what shift I have. My kids would need a babysitter who can get them to school everyday and who could handle my 2year old and newborn at home all day. My one daughter only has school half a day and so they would have to pick her up in the middle of the day and then go back for the second child. My teen dd will be playing tennis again this year which means loads of practice and she really wont be able to help much at the house. My son will be away at college so he wont be able to help at all. My DH is not great with the girls on his own, but he swearers that he would be able to watch them once he got off work and would be able to help around the house.
I think its all just to confusing to deal with right now and I just want to lock myself in a closet. I know that we need the money and I know that jobs are hard to come by, but honestly I feel like I would better serve my family at home. Our house is a nut house already and dealing with chores on a daily basis is difficult when I am home all day. Laundry, cleaning, cooking and the kids is a full time job and I just now got to where I can handle them all and not go crazy, adding an 8 hour shift would almost kill me. I know that if I accept this job the amount of work for me will double at home and my husband will really not be much help because he is not much help now. Also while at my job interview my DH was offered a chance to work a second job, something we had recently discussed him looking for. He and I had just decided that I would be a SAHM and he would work two jobs until we paid off some of our big bills. He has decided to try for the second job just in case I don't get the job and even if I do he will keep it. This means longer hours for our babysitter.
I also have school and would have to find a way to fit all that in also. The biggest issue is breastfeeding and cloth diapering would have to stop because no one else will use the cloth diapers but me and my dd and I would not be able to pump every 2 hours while at work so my milk would eventually become less. I have a laundry list of reasons why not to take the job and only a few reasons to take the job. I would love to get out of the house daily, I would love to help out my family financially and I would love to be able to purchase a vehicle for the family. Its just so difficult, but I guess in the end its not up to me. I will be handing in my background paper work Monday and it will take several weeks my papers to come in so I guess until then I just wait to see if I am going to be working this winter or if I will still be a stay at home mom.
Wow, this was a really long vent and I am glad that I have a place to get it out instead of just looking crazy or crying uncontrollable like I have been doing for the past few days. Life is never easy and always has so many decisions that if you make the wrong choice you think about for ever. I don't want to make the wrong choice and hurt my family and that is why I am so conflicted, either way I choose its going to impact everyone and in different ways.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Sticky and Sweet
I am entering a contest for a S’mores prize pack as a member of the Mom Bloggers Club.
Jayde
The Great Escape
The big question was why had she decided to leave the house, it turns out that she was trying to follow her big sister. She tried to cross the street and get to the church yard where her sister and her friends hang out everyday. We now have childproof handles on the front door and the kids know from now on to leave out of the side door. You can hear our side door opening from every room in our house.
I know that I can not watch her 24/7 and she is a quick little booger, but it would kill me if any harm came to her so I hope this is the end of her outdoor adventures and I pray that we do not go through this when our son reaches 2. Tonight as she sleeps my husband and I are just happy that she is safe in her bed, in her room, and yes I have checked a few times just to be sure.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
A New Leaf
I learned that there are tons of people who cloth diapers and there are so many different types that it can be very overwhelming. I had decided to cloth diaper before he was born, but was not sure what system would work best for me. I decided on gdiaprs because I can use the disposables inserts when my husband changes him, and during the day I can use the gcloths or even prefolds (thanks to many suggestions on each board). I also learned that I don't have to wash as much because I am not washing the liner each time, I just switch out the liner if it gets soiled. I am on day 3 of this adventure and I will disclose that at night we still use sposies because I still have some and DH stated we are not letting them go to waste so until he grows out of them or we use them all its our night time routine. So far my 14 year old DD is the only other person to use the diapers and she said it was easy and had no issue using them.

Thursday, July 8, 2010
Logan's Birth Story
On May the 14th I was 7 months pregnant and feeling a little under the weather. My husband begged me to go to the hospital and I said no.
On May the 15th I was still feeling bad and again my husband asked me to go to the hospital again I said no, but I promised if I was not feeling better the next day that I would go.
On May the 16th I was still not feeling well and for once I actually listened to my husband and against my better judgement I went to the hospital.
I was not bleeding and I was not having contractions, but I had a strange discharge and I was felling, well the best I can put it is, strange. I went in to the hospital thinking I will make my husband feel better and I will be vindicated when they say that I am just tired and nothing is wrong.
They decided after a few test that I was just dehydrated and decided to pump me full of fluid and to give me a broad spectrum antibiotic because they thought I had an infection. It took them several time to find an I.V. because I was so dehydrated and it was actually nice to be able to lay down with all those people fussing over me. The did a vaginal exam and stated that all was fine, I was not dilated. Shortly after my exam I started having contractions and they got a little worried but quickly gave me medication to get them under control, over the next few hours I had two doses of the medication and my contraction finally stopped and they sent me home with the promise that I would keep drinking water and that I would see my doctor if I felt ill again. This was around 11:00 p.m, we live about a half hour away from the hospital my husband took me to that day and had been gone most of the day so I was glad to get home and get into my bed.
Around 3:15 I was awoken by a very bad dream and a strange pain, I of course thought it was just Braxton Hicks. After a few minutes of these strange pains I realized two things, it was contractions and they were getting really close. I woke up my husband and told him call him mother to come stay with the kids and to get dressed because I needed to go to the ER. He jumped into action and in no time we were on our way. I had a serious of 7 contractions on route to the hospital, this time we went to the closer one which was only 15 minutes away.
Once we arrived I knew things were bad because when I got out of the car I was bleeding. I walked into the ER and was wheeled back immediately once they got me in the room to change everyone realized I was bleeding heavily and that things were not alright. I let the nurses know that I wasn't due for 2 more months and they let me know that this baby was coming right now. They were in the process of shaving, catheterizing and prepping me for an emergency C section when they noticed that my son was crowning. As the doctor walked into the room he saw the situation and immediately sprang into action. I pushed two times and out came my son, along with the placenta which as you might know is not a good thing. Somehow my placenta had detached and that was the cause of my premature labor. In less then 5 minutes my son was born, 3lbs 15oz and rushed to the nursery to help stabilize him and help him breath.
I say my son for a few minutes before he was prepped and readied to head to the NICU of a different hospital 1 hour away from me. It broke my heart when they brought him in my room in an incubator, but I was relieved that so many people were working so hard to take care of him. The nurse practitioner assured me that they would do there best and that they would call me once he arrived and was settled.
Logan was given surfactant to help strengthen his lungs and was only on the ventilator for a few hours. He was on oxygen for a while, but his levels were very low. Our beautiful baby boy spent a little over 3 weeks in the NICU and came home a whooping 5lbs. It was one of the strangest deliveries for me and since the was #6 it was not what I expected at all.
I learned a few things from all of this.
1. I am not as strong as I thought I was, but I am stronger then I care to admit. (crazy I know)
2. Babies are so strong and such fighters.
3. My husband is my rock and I need him, even when I don't think I do.
4. When you don't feel "normal" or "right" go to the doctor because it could be something serious.
5. NICU nurses are awesome and I am blessed for the wonderful angels that helped our family.
In the end I got my son,he is home and I got out of being 9 months pregnant during the hot summer in the California heat. Now I am just waiting for the next crazy adventure with my family
Monday, July 5, 2010
Diapers, Diapers, and more diapers
I look forward to testing them out and letting you know how they work.
Jayde
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Happy 4th of July
Its the small holidays with just our close family that I really love and I am looking forward to a quiet and peaceful day of fun. I wish your family fun and safety on this 4th of July
Saturday, June 26, 2010
Terrible, Terrible 2's
She is a beautiful child who is ready to take on the world or at least take it apart. L3 has been the baby for 2 years now and she played her part well. Right now we are dealing with the terrible 2's as well as the need to be the center of attention sprinkled with the desire to be potty trained. Its a hard cocktail to swallow, but its what is being served at house all day everyday. I find myself losing patients with her because her Independence is unnerving to say the least during the time of shift to our family.
L3 can be super helpful and down right dangerous in the same moment. We decided while I was pregnant that she would never be alone with the baby at any point. So far she has done minimal damage, but not without trying. More and more everyday she amazes me with her ability to be the strangest, cutest, and silliest child around. 2 is a hard year for not only the adults but also the other children, she has worn out her sibling as well. We have all decided that we will give her the chance to turn 3. Yes she will continue to grow and change and amaze us and surprise us each day, but we hope that she will run out of some of her energy soon before we are all completely exhausted and unable to keep up with her.
Loving, learning and looking forward to growing with her.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Happy Father's Day
Father's Day is both happy and sad in our family. On this day I am reminded of my oldest daughter's father who passed away when she was still very little. It has been 8 years now and it still makes me cry to know that he is not here to watch her grown and change. He was a wonderful father and not only loved our daughter but also loved my )our) son. He came into my life with 4 children of his own and I came in with one. It was a very complicated situation for most people but not for us. We found a way to make it work and all 6* of our children loved our large and unusual family. My late husband made a point to never make my son feel like he was less then. My oldest son was only 3 when I got married but since that day he was always Louis's son and no one could deny that. He still claims him as his first Father to this day. He loved all of our children and it was a sad day when we lost him. But we can look back on all the wonderful times that we had together as a family and how amazing he was as a father.
My son and daughter are both very lucky to have had a wonderful father and to also be blessed with another man who was willing to walk into my life and take on the role of father to two that were not his own. My current husband is younger than I and had no previous children, but came in with his eyes and heart open. It has not been an easy road but he has stuck with it and it has paid off. We now have a total of 6* children and 4 are ours but no one could tell that he has not been here the entire time.
It is not easy to parent someone else's children and any man who is willing to step in and try to be not just a parent but a true father to your child is a special person. In my life I have been lucky enough to truly fall in love 2 times and both times those men have chosen to be part of my children's life.
So on a day like today, I celebrate the men in my family who have made my life so wonderful by being amazing fathers. To all the fathers past, present, and future.
Note: If you were keeping count, yes that is a total of 10 children that I have had a hand in raising over the last 16 years they don't all live with me, but they all still call me Mom. (4 step and 6 biological)
Friday, June 18, 2010
The next few weeks I am sure will give me a chance to get into grove and be able to handle all the kids at one time. I have to be stronger with the girls and their lack of patience when I am busy with the baby. I have also learned the best think to do is involve the girls in the diaper changing process as much as I can. I have also made an effort to give each girl their own time even if just a few minutes of snuggle and kissing to make sure that they know they are still important and still love.
The only thing I am really having issue with beside the lack of sleep is finding time to do my homework with out 500 interruptions. I guess I will have to go with my original ideal of only doing homework when someone else is at the house or when all the little kids are sleep. It means that I get less sleep, didn't think that was possible. Best strategy so far is to keep a week ahead in my classes so that when I have off days it wont impact my grade.
As of yesterday Logan is one month old and our life is so much different then it was 30 days ago. I thank God everyday for all the blessing he has given us and for allowing my sweet little boy to come home.
Jayde
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Jayde
A stressful joy
My original plan was to have a nursery ready, and to be totally prepared to welcome him home with a scheduled and organized life. Not going to happen, I can only hope to be able to remember to feed everyone daily and hope that someone will have pity on me and help with the cleaning. Best laid plans have gone to the way side and I just think we will have to go on the fly and hope for the best.
In the big picture yes my home is full of chaos, but it was pretty much that way before he was born. Is it going to be hectic, yep and that is the way I like it. I know that it might take some time but there will be a routine at some point and it wont be sleepless nights and cranky days forever. All my kids are home and that is something that brings me a joy that I have never felt. 3 wks and 4 days was a long time to wait for him to come home and now that he is here I will enjoy all the beautiful, crazy, insane, funny, moments that are all part of my family and my family life.
Jayde
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Cartoon on the Brain
I have decided to make it my new mission to expose them to these shows because they were fun. Not like the cartoons of today that have taken insane to a new level. My 15 year old daughter is a Cartoon Network junkie and I admit that I do watch a lot of shows with her. I admit to enjoying a few shows on Disney XD, my favorite right now is Phineas & Ferb; I even have one of their songs on my Ipod. Its not that cartoons aren't funny anymore I just want to see my kids do more laughing when they watch them.
I remember really looking forward to Saturday cartoons, and that is not the case with my kids. Partly because cartoons now come on everyday and most of the cartoons on during the weekend are "educational". Who wants to be educated on a Saturday? So over the next few months I will be ordering various cartoons to add to our DVD library in the hopes that my children will find something to really laugh at. Maybe when its all said and done, I need something to laugh at and having my kids along for the ride will make it even more special.
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Sunday, June 6, 2010
My oldest son is moving on with his life and going to college in a few weeks; my youngest son is in the NICU and cannot control either situation. It felt like I was drowning and that there was no live preserver coming to save me. I spend most of the day in a funk and for some reason could not bring myself to talk to my husband. He of course was under the impression that he had did something wrong. After hours of crying and hiding in my room, I finally decided that my husband deserved to know that I was not mad at him, that I was just mad at the situation.
It’s not been an easy few weeks for us and I guess that I was trying to be strong by no letting my emotions out, by not crying, by not being true to myself. It never works out well when you deny your feelings or when you try not feeling what is going on with your inner self. My emotions are complicated and compounded by so many things going on right now and it just seems that when you have hit the wall it really hurts. I know that I have to look at the bright side of things and remind myself that my oldest son moving on is a good thing and shows that I have somewhat prepared him to go on and live life after high school. My youngest son is in the NICU but he is doing well, he might not be making daily progress but the fact that he is steady and not going backwards is a victory in itself.
My husband held me for a long time this afternoon and I allowed him to do it and that was what we both needed. I have to keep him in the loop and remember that we are in this together and when I need to fall he will be there to catch me and I will do the same for him. We look forward to the next few weeks and the challenges that they will bring and we know that together we can face them together as long as we turn to each other and keep looking at the bright side.
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Underpressure
He was alert and hungry when we got there and it gave me a chance to breast feed him, which he not only latch but he ate like a champ. We did not spend a lot of time there but it was enough for me to get my baby fix, for Logan to have some time with us and more importantly for me to feel like I spend enough time with both sets of kids.
This truly is the most difficult part of all being so far away from Logan and never feeling like I give enough to all of my kids. The guilt is overwhelming and I fear it will not get any better even after he is home. I hope to be able to visit him Saturday, but it all depends on our finances which have taken a beating since all this started.
That is the second worst thing about this entire situation. Having to choose between something for my kids at home or being able to visit my son. I will be glad when all of this is over and I can go back to our normal life, or at least a somewhat normal life.
Friday, June 4, 2010
The ungraduation graduate, graduates
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Update on Logan 6/3/10
Born the year of the Tiger with a fighting spirit!
Monday, May 31, 2010
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Two weeks of relaxation
After our son was born, the instructions from the doctor were as follows.
- Increase your daily water intake.
- Keep a list of foods daily to monitor your calorie intake.
- Sleep as much as possible
- Do not lift anything more that 20lbs.
- Sit with legs elevated as much as possible.
- Take it easy for the next 14 days, no housework, no stressful activates.
Well I would love to say that I followed all the instructions to the letter, but I wasn't even close. I have tried to watch the amount of calories I intake because I am making breast milk and it takes a lot to produce and maintain my body. I have significantly increased my water so much that I think you could hear the ocean if you listened to my belly button. Sleeping is out because I am pumping every 2-3 hours and it's hard to get quality sleep that way. Lifting my toddler doesn't count on the not lifting things that weight more than 20lbs right, I mean how else would she get to bed, out of bed, on the changing table and off the changing table. Sitting with my legs elevated was necessary, because I would swell on a daily basis if I was on my feet for too long, which I was just about every day for the first week. The no housework rule went out the window on day two and I haven't slowed down much on that one because well I like to be able to see my floor.
The sad part about all this is that my husband is currently on medical leave due to the sudden arrival of our baby and I still could not find a way to really take it easy or relax. I am the mother so I guess that makes me the first line of defense when the kids want or need something. We could both be on the sofa and the kids will come to me and my hubby won't hear them make a request. It was somewhat annoying to have him always ask why are you up or why can't you relax, I finally had to tell him that it's not in my nature and that he needed to be more diligent if he wanted to keep me on the couch. Well thank goodness my 14 days are almost over because all this relaxing and rest is driving me crazy. I guess I should have tried harder to take advantage, but as I mentioned before it's just not in my nature and really isn't possible when you have 5 kids at home and a husband who really doesn't know what it takes to keep the house running each day. Well back to resting, I have some homemade cinnamon buns to put in the oven.
Saturday, May 29, 2010
Update on Logan
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Another great visit
We had another visit with L4 yesterday and it was short but sweet. We only got to spend about an hour and a half with him but it was great because we got to hold him almost the entire time. L4 is doing very well, he has all his IV's removed and is only taking breast milk right now. He has gained weight and is now above the 4lb mark. Soon we will be able to try to nipple or nurse him once the doctor gives the all clear. He still is on oxygen, but it's very low and he has a feeding tube until he starts to show more interest in nipple feeds. The prognosis is good for our little man to be home in a few weeks. We won't be able to see him until Friday, but I hope that it is another visit filled with good news and good feelings. I am so grateful to the wonderful nursing staff at the hospital where he is staying, they make me feel confident that when I leave he is well taken care of and that helps me sleep at night. Praying for a speedy recovery.
The waiting game
It doesn’t feel like I gave birth, because he is not here for me to hold and cuddle. It’s not easy to get up for pumping as it would be if I were nursing a baby. I feel a little hollow right now, because I got a new baby, but not all the joy that comes with a new baby. It’s a strange feeling to know that my child is over an hour away from me and I can only see him every other day. It’s been hard to explain to my small children that L4 is staying at the hospital because he is sick and needs extra care that mommy & Daddy cannot give him.
I look at his picture everyday and feel a big hole in my heart. I feel like it might be hard for me to bond to my newest child because I am missing so much of his days. It seems silly because he won’t remember not being in my arms, but I will. My husband and I are trying to be there for each other, but it’s difficult because now money is tight, we have had very little sleep and we are stressed with all the driving and just trying to be there for all of our children. I have hope that my precious little man will come home soon and we will be able to take care of him and put all of this behind us. I dream of him every night and cannot wait to add him to our already crazy life. It’s not the easiest road I have ever taken, but I am glad to take this journey if at the end I get to meet my little man and hold him in my arms.
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Welcome to our newest member
Our youngest children still need us to be here for them and that has been the hardest thing to handle. I am trying to be in two places at once and its just not working. The recommendation from the doctors is for me to rest and take it easy for 2 weeks. Not really something that I can do while running back and forth to the hospital and trying to keep life normal for the little ones who are at home.
My teens have not been the best help during this trying time and that has added to my stress. Money is a major issue right now because my husband is not working in order to help me keep the house running and being able to transport me to the hospital. My stress level needs to stay low in order for me to keep up my ability to produce milk.
Trying to keep a store of milk for my little man is a lot of work as many of you know. Its not easy to build up a supply while your baby is so far away. I am working on pumping every 2 hours but it just seems to be impossible to stay on a schedule. I know that its only been a few days and I hope that things settle down a little in the days to come. My biggest happiness is that my son is OK and has very few issues and I hope that it remains that way. I also am grateful for my health at this time, now all I need is some way to keep my sanity until they baby comes home and then of course I will lose it again.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Logan Ray was 3lbs 14 oz at birth and 21 inches long. We look for his health to continue to improve and can't wait until we can bring him home.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
The ungraduated son
My son was to attend college in the summer, and play football for a local city college and that dream is now out of reach. I have spend this entire year reminding him that only he can pass the 12th grade. I am usually a person who would yell and scream and demand that he does his homework and so on and so forth. This time I took a different approach because my son is a lot like me and does not respond well to threats. He has had every opportunity to get his needed credits, everyone has bent over backwards forwards and sideways for him, but he just doesn't seem to care. So I have decided to let him fail and see how he pulls his butt out of the fire. I am in no way looking for a last second miracle to happen in this case I have conceded to the fact that I will not have a graduate this year and if and when he graduates it will be on his own terms.

Sunday, May 9, 2010
Mother's Day Pride
On this day I look back at all the wonderful things that my mother did for me. I am not now and have never been a perfect daughter and so I give a special thanks to my mother for putting up with all of my issues and crap. My mother was a single mom with two kids to care for and one of them was sick. It was not easy for her to work a full time job with an every changing schedule and still be a full time mom and dad to both me and my little brother. She was almost always there and even when she wasn't she made sure that we knew it was because she had no other chose. I applaud my mom for her teaching me that nothing is perfect, nothing is easy and nothing is promised. I look at my children and hope that they know there is nothing I would not do for them. I have one person in my life who has never let me down and that is my mother. I would give anything to be half the parent that she is and was. As this mother's day goes on, I will continue to think of the wonderful and imaginative way that she parented and the confidence that she gave me to just be me. I look forward to many more mother's day with my own children. So to my mother, my grandmothers, and my great grandmothers I say thank you and I love you for each of you has influenced me in some special way and without you I wouldn't be who I am today.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
So close, yet so far
Dear little boy, you and I have been on this journey for a few months now and I have to tell you that I am very excited to see us getting closer and closer to the end. I know that we still have a long way to go before we get to meet face to face but its getting really exciting now. I have had dreams about you and all night I wonder what you are going to look like (more like me we hope). Its been an interesting time with your big sister making me reevaluate my decision to have another child on an almost hourly basis. You and I spend plenty of time together now, but what will it be like once you are here. Are you going to like the house filled with people, will you be able to go down for a nap in the middle of all this insanity. Are you going to be like L1 and jump at every noise or are you going to be like L2 & L3 who could sleep through anything.
There are so many question that I have about you and for you and I look forward to discovering the answers with you. My major concern right now is a name for you, we are still having issues in that area and I am on the losing time this time. I hope that your father and I can come together and give you a name that fits you.
As we continue our journey please note that yes, its always this loud in our house, yes there are a lot of people living here and yes you will be loved by all of them. There are many sleepless night ahead for us to discuss the rest of the matters but for now we are on this ride together and I want you to know that no matter what I am very happy to be with you. I look forward to welcoming you into the world, the only thing I ask is that you make it a quick and painless process for your old mother. SMILE
Love and Kisses from your mommy
Why is marriage a crime
Saturday, May 1, 2010
A Rose by any other name
Thursday, April 29, 2010
The single Married mother
My husband and I go to be at the same hour, but I get up several hours before he does, to cook and clean and deal with the kids. He gets up eats, and then goes to work out or goes to do his homework. I do not have that luxury; I have to get up before the kids do just to take a shower by myself. I often find myself wondering how in the world I have allowed this to go on for so long. You would think that I would have noticed this after the first few kids’ right, well I did but I just let it be and now I really have no supporting arguments. Therefore, I have put myself in this position and here is where I will continue to be. I have 2 kids who can take care of themselves, but my 3 youngest are a real handful and I just wish I could get him to understand it’s not easy to do it all alone. He does see me struggle and always tells me that I do too much, but if I did not do it who would. With baby #6 on the way, I know that I will be up late at night and early in the morning because there will be no help from my husband and he will not lose any sleep over this. Does this make him a bad person, nope, but it does make me an idiot for allowing it to go on for so long and not being able to change it.
In the larger picture I am grateful for my husband he does love me and the children and even if he is not really helpful around the house or with the kids I should be happy that he is here and makes the money. I have chosen to take it all in stride and hope for the best as each child gets older I will hopefully get more free time (right). I wish that I could just explain my need for help for the 100th time and he would get it but I have decided it is not worth it and I guess I will get some sleep in about what 7 - 10 years from now. In addition, just think he wants me to get a full time job on top of all of this and still be able to take care of everyone and the house and go to school. I think I will go back to work and then hire a house cleaner and a nanny to give me a hand since I am not getting one from him.
That is my gripe for the week and I hope that everyone has a wonderful weekend.
Sunday, April 18, 2010
How Much Time is Too Much?
Recently I was watching a show that stated that women make their own workload; they were talking about stay at home moms. Is it true do we creates hectic schedule so that people will feel sorry for us or do we actually have busy days?
I have to admit that a lot of times there are moments in my day when I do get to sit down and enjoy a moment or two too myself and although they are few and far between it does happen. In a typical day, I do cook, clean, and take care of the children and that does take a lot of time but I believe that I do actually have more time then I admit to my husband and myself. For the next few weeks I am really going to re-evaluate how much time I spend doing each chore and how much time I spend alone. Sleeping, eating and schoolwork will not count as free time, but time on the computer and time watching TV will. I know that with three little girls' home all day I am very busy at times and I know that I also have down time when the youngest one is napping and the oldest one is at school.
Does this mean that my day is not hectic? Does this mean that I do not actually do as much as I think I do? Not sure of the answer right now, but I know that this little experiment might help me learn that I can do things more efficient or that I can do them differently. Therefore, as of Monday I will seriously look at my daily schedule to see when I am the busiest and what things I can move around to help me produce a more productive day.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Back on the horse
Monday, April 12, 2010
Sunday, March 14, 2010
The View Recap: Week March 8 -12
Tuesday March 9th: Whoopi and Sherri were both back and i really enjoyed the show. Andy Garcia and his daughter Dominik Garcia-Lorido were on the show to talk about thier new movie City Island. I enjoyed seeing a non dysfunctional family who can work together. I wish the interview had been longer. The also had some authors on to discuss their book, Flow: The Cultural Story of Menstruation. I have to tell you that was a very intersting segment and I have decided that it is on my list of books to read.
Wednesday March 10th: All the co host were on this episode and one of my favorite actors Forest Whitaker came to discuss his new movie, Our Family Wedding. He also taked about his movie with Jude Law, Repo Men. I have to admit that I would like to go see the family movie and my son wants to see Repo Men. It was a good interview. Last but not least former governor Jesse Ventura was there with his new book, American Conspiracies, it will not be on my list of must reads but he is alway very entertaining.
Thursday March 11th: Sir Elton John was there and it was just more then I could handle. I was looking forward to this episode all week, and as usually he did not dissapoint. Eric McCormack was there to discuss his new Lifetime movie, Who is Clark Rockefeller? I am looking forward to watching that its recording right now. I have missed him and was sad to see that his last show was not continued. National Enquirer's Barry Levine was also there to talk abou the fact that they have been on the front of a lot of breaking news stories lately which is not how things were previously. I still wont read it but it is intersting to know that they do actually have real journalist working there.
Friday March 12th: Sad to say that I was unable to see this one because it was not recorded. Christopher Walken, Carolina Herrera, Carol Leifer were on and I will be watching it in the moring after the kids go down for a nap on the internet.
“I am a participant in a Mom Central campaign for ABC Daytime and will receive a tote bag or other The View branded items to facilitate my review.”
http://www.momcentral.com/
Reflections

Sunday, March 7, 2010
General Hospital in Review March 1-5
“I am a participant in a Mom Central campaign for ABC Daytime and will receive a tote bag or other General Hospital branded items to facilitate my review.”
the View Week in Review March 1-5
I am a participant in a Mom Central campaign for ABC Daytime and will receive a tote bag or other The View branded items to facilitate my review.”
http://www.momcentral.com/
Friday, March 5, 2010
Weekly update for Feb 28- March 6
Thursday, March 4, 2010
General Hospital
Saturday, February 27, 2010
The View: Week 22-26, my view

Monday,Senator Evan Bayh came on and I would have like them to have more time with him, it seemed he just wasn't able to answer all the questions that were flying at him. From what I have read about him, his decision to quite was not easy. They also talked about credit card regulations and the things you have to look out for with Jordan E. Goodman. Also on the discussion board was their reactions to the Tiger Woods interview.
Tuesday's show included Ricky Gervais and the cast of the Jersey Shore, I have to admit that I am not a big fan of the Jersey shore and was not really interested in the interview but I did sit through the entire thing. I have to admit I felt like I really could feel how Whoopi and Joy were feeling. I just think I am too old to get into the show and really give a crap about the cast. I tried to watch a few episodes with my Son who is 18 and I just got annoyed. To those of you who enjoy the show more power to you and enjoy. Ricky Gervais on the other hand is one of my favorite and I had a blast watching and I have already started watching his new show on HBO it’s a scream. I just love the conversations that he and his friends have and it’s actually a show my sister and I enjoy.
On Wednesdays show, I was very surprised to see Nadya Suleman on the show and was somewhat put off by some of the questions but I thought for the most part it was a good interview. I also did not think it was nice of them to keep calling her the Octomom to her face. I did like the line of questions they did have and I hope that this women can figure out a way to take care of these 14 children and heal her family as well as herself. I know a lot of people did not like that she was on the show, but she was not paid for the interview and I believe that no matter how you feel about her she is a Hot Topic.
Thursday was all about infertility and they had Bill and Giuliana Rancic who are dealing with that issue very openly on their show. It was a good interview and I have to admit that I agreed with Whoopi, if you really want a baby you would gain the 5-10 pounds. It was interesting to see the couple where the man was the infertile one and the two women who are older and still trying to conceive. I myself have not had issue with infertility but I know many who have and it’s a serious and hard issue to deal with and I hope that the information that was provided helped someone.
Friday was a little less serious, on were Regis and Joy Philbin and I have to say it was nice to see Regis in such a good mood. I loved that they performed together. There was also a segment on yet another way for weight loss with The F-Factor Diet, Tanya Zuckerbrot. Fiber and protein with every meal should help you lose weight, well we shall see. Dr Gadget was also back with some fabulous gadgets from the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas that was my favorite segment.
I am looking forward to next week when they will have Robert Pattinson, Lisa Kudrow not to mention Wesley Snipe and Don Cheadle. See you next week.
I am a participant in a Mom Central campaign for ABC Daytime and will receive a tote bag or other The View branded items to facilitate my review.”
http://www.momcentral.com/
Thursday, February 25, 2010

One of the best games I think anyone could come up with and I am happy that I got it for my children. I purchased the Uno Farm game for my kids this christmas and they love it and I would recommend this product to anyone with young children. They seem to have a better time with this over candy land or chutes and ladders so I suggest if you can go out and get it.